Battered and bruised

I'm kinda hurting this week. Especially after yesterday's trip to the playground.
It wasn't bad enough that I started rooting around in the landscaping a week or two ago, forgetting all about the poison ivy that graces our woods and yard. It never even crossed my mind. I think I just figured it wasn't in bloom yet. Ha - not so true.
At least I wore gloves while I pulled all sorts of things out of our flower beds and rock walls in front of the house. But I was wearing short sleeves, or at least a long-sleeved t-shirt with the sleeves pulled up.
Idiot.
Now I've got a wicked rash on one arm, and some really itchy spots on the other. If it wouldn't permanently scar my arms and potentially cause an infection, I would scrape the living shit out of them with some box cutters.
The best relief I've found so far is to put my arms under the hottest water I can get coming out of the shower head. Seriously freakin' hot. As in all the way to the red H. It feels so good beating down on the rash - in fact it's the only thing that DOES feel good on it right now.
Then came yesterday and our trip to the playground. The girls and I decided to play hide and seek on the massive play area, a fun thing we started last summer.
Before long it was my turn to try and hide from the girls, so I ran over and ducked under a part of the wooden play area. As I quickly scooted forward while crouched like a baseball catcher, I completely whacked my head on the beam above me, sending me straight into the woodchips.
I've knocked my head on cupboards doors, trunk lids, all sorts of stuff in years past. But this motherf***er hurt bad. As the girls ran up to me screaming "I found you!" all I could think of was how much of a sissy I felt like for sitting there rubbing my head.
I thought, well, this will smart for a few minutes and then we'll be back in action.
Not so fast. A few minutes later I was still amazed at the level of pain shooting down from the top of my head. Within about 20 minutes, a nice lump had formed up there, about the size of half a golf ball.
Even today, 24 hours later, it still hurts to even touch it. Last night Addie was trying to make me feel better by rubbing it for me.... that didn't last long.
"Are you mad, daddy?" she asked. "Yes, honey but not at you..."